The Machine Malfunctioned & Dirty Minds
by Increasing Paranoia
Summary: Roxas was going to blame all of this on Zexion's stupid machine and his co-workers' dirty minds. Because, seriously, he'd never thought about kissing Axel before.
1. An Awakening

A/N: So this one has been floating around in my mind since I started Chapter 2 of Who He Should Be. I'll be working on (hopefully) the final chapter of that story next, but I just needed to get this posted before it slipped out of my mind forever. Hope you all enjoy it. I know I had fun writing it!

* * *

"Are you sure it's safe?" Axel asked again.

"As safe as anything experimental can be." Zexion responded. "The Organization wants something that will help in training exercises. They're hoping that this," he gestured to the machine behind him, "will be able to help. I've crunched the numbers multiple times; there should be less than a 1% chance of your brain cells frying - though it might be an improvement," he smirked.

"Hey!" Axel shouted, pouting.

"What's it meant to do?" Roxas asked, ignoring Axel's sulking. Zexion pushed his hair out of his face.

"Basically, it ties all of us into one dream. It allows us to run through training scenarios without any physical risk. Go ahead and lay down. I'll hook you two in first. The other's should be here soon."

* * *

Roxas woke and blearily wiped his eyes. Looking around he noted that he was in Hollow Bastion and it was twilight. Axel was off to his left playing with his lighter. Staggering to his feet, Roxas headed towards him.

"Where's everyone else?" Axel flipped the lighter shut and shoved it in his pocket before answering.

"Malfunction. They're connected to the machine, but can't take a physical form. We're stuck here for awhile." Roxas pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Will they be alright?" Axel shrugged in response.

"Zexion said they're fine, but the only way they can talk in here is through images. We'll basically be watching dreams play out before us." Axel smirked. "Which should be interesting." Roxas groaned. He really did NOT want to know what his co-workers dreamed about. Axel motioned off to his right. "Looks like the show's beginning." Roxas couldn't help himself. Turning around he saw a young man wailing away on guitar. The song itself was extraordinarily complicated and Roxas recognized it as one Demyx was attempting to master on his sitar. As the song progressed to a more complicated bridge, the man began dissipating as if he were made of smoke. Axel made an amused noise in the back of his throat. Roxas arched an eyebrow at him, but Axel merely shrugged, eyes still trained at the end of the alley.

"I'm slightly more worried about what the rest of our co-workers are going to be dreaming about," Roxas admitted. Axel chuckled. "Look, I know _you_ like anything you can use to blackmail people, but I'd rather not get a glimpse into the inner psyche of my co-workers. Especially when they're as twisted as ours."

"Don't you think it'd be fun to try and match the dreams to the person?" Axel inquired mischievously.

"_NO_." Axel chuckled at Roxas' answer as the next dream formed down the alley. Roxas' eyebrows drew together in confusion as he watched the spectacle. He shot an inquiring look at the pyromaniac, but Axel seemed just as confused. They watched silently as their doppelgangers danced - literally - down the alley. "...the hell?" Roxas asked as their dream selves disappeared. The odd spectacle continued. It was in the middle of a dream based off Zorro - Axel as Zorro, who was rescuing a Roxas in distress (which provided the REAL Axel no end of amusement, while the REAL Roxas was less than impressed) - when they were abruptly deposited back in the real world.

"Well..." Axel stated, sitting up and pulling the needle out of his arm. "That was...interesting." Roxas groaned and sat up, rubbing both his hands over his face.

"I _really_ didn't need to know what our co-workers thought about us."

"I don't know, Rox, I was pretty impressed with that Zorro dream Zexion interrupted." Roxas shot an acidic glare at the red-head. To a more sane person, the look might have read something along the lines of, 'I WILL END YOU'. But Axel blatantly chose to ignore it. "You're just mad because the dreamer had you in the role of helpless heroine. It's okay, Roxas," he placed a comforting hand on the blond's shoulder. "I know that you'd be helping to kick ass just as soon as I untied your ropes." Anything that he might have added was lost as his face connected with the floor.

"You're an ass." Roxas stated simply, stepping over his prostrate body and exiting the room. Lifting himself from the floor, Axel dusted himself off before following his moody companion.

"Come on, Roxas, whatever happened to chivalry?" The blond chose to ignore him, stalking down the Organization's hallways and glaring at anyone who passed him by. He didn't know who had dreamed up what he had witnessed, but everyone was going to know his displeasure about it. He had never been more happy than when he caught sight of his bedroom door. Slipping inside, he threw himself face down on the bed. "Oh, please, today wasn't _that_ bad." Axel stated, leaning against the door jam.

"Mmmff." Roxas stated emphatically. Turning his head away from the mattress, he continued. "Go away." Axel raised an eyebrow before deciding to follow Roxas' advice, just this once.

"Fine. See you tomorrow, blondie." A groan was his only response.

* * *

Roxas stared at the redhead in front of him. Axel was talking, hands cutting through the air in wild gesticulation but Roxas wasn't paying attention. He was watching Axel's face. He watched as emotions flickered across, as his eyes sparked with fire. He watched as his hands moved as if they could help get the pyromaniac's point across more quickly. Whatever Axel was trying to tell him was getting lost, because all Roxas could hear was a low humming noise, and it wasn't coming through very clearly. The only thing Roxas _could_ hear was a traitorous voice in the back of his mind asking, 'What would it be like to kiss him?' As if of its own accord, Roxas' body moved closer to the taller teen. His hands reached out and grabbed both of Axel's upper arms, pinning him in place, before...

Roxas woke to his stereo alarm clock blasting Straight to Hell by The Clash. 'How appropriate,' he thought. He sat up and rubbed his face, as if you could banish any lingerings from the dream. He had no idea where it had come from, but he did know that it was all because of Zexion's stupid machine and his co-workers' dirty minds.


	2. Sage Advice & the Horrors of Fanfiction

_Today is going much better than yesterday_, Roxas thought. He took another bite of his Sea Salt ice cream as he watched the tournament below. Hayner was fighting Seifer in the Struggle Cup and neither boy was giving an inch. _I should take more days off_, he mused.

Technically speaking, the blond was still on call, but he had decided to get out of the building. The other members - with the exception of Axel, Demyx and Zexion - had been slinking around in the shadows, trying to keep an eye on the blond while staying out of his way. Roxas could only surmise that they had wanted to see how the younger boy was taking the dreams while simultaneously staying well out of his reach. Axel had not been helping to dispel rumors of their supposed togetherness, either. Every time the red-head caught his eye, Axel would grin and wink at him. Roxas had been torn about whether he should punch the smug asshole's face or scream. So when Demyx had invited him to join him and Zexion in a trip to Twilight Town, Roxas had agreed.

"Hey, Roxas." The blond turned and greeted his new companion.

"Hey, Namine. How have you been?" The small woman slipped into the seat next to Roxas, taking the time to smooth her skirt before answering.

"I'm alright. But Demyx tells me that you had a rough day yesterday." Roxas sighed, rolling his eyes. Trust Demyx to go blab the smaller blond's business to the first willing (or unwilling - the sitarist didn't particularly care whether his audience wanted to hear what he was saying or not) listener. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"There's nothing to talk about. Axel and I are just friends. The fact that our co-workers have filthy imaginations is not going to change anything." Roxas stated, watching Hayner parry Seifer's attack.

"So you _are_ just friends?" Namine asked. Roxas stared at her and she shrugged. "I thought you guys might have been trying to keep things on the down-low. I mean, I've never seen either one of you date, and the two of you act more like a couple than most real couples I know." Roxas groaned, leaning forward and placing his head on his knees.

"Not you, too!" he pleaded. Namine patted his back comfortingly. "We're just friends!" That was his story, and he was sticking to it.

"Then why is this bothering you so much?" she asked, looking into his eyes when he finally raised his head off his knees. The dream from last night raced to the forefront of his brain, and Roxas broke the gaze, turning his attention back to the match. Realization and understanding dawned on the young girl's face. "You're starting to think of him like that, aren't you?" Roxas could feel the blush rising on his face and he scowled down at the ground. A soft hand brushed through his unruly hair and he lifted his gaze back to Namine's face. "You should talk to him, Roxas. As your friend, he deserves that much." Roxas scowled again, but didn't argue. "Thank you," she stated, taking his silence as agreement. "Hayner won, by the way," she continued, rising from her seat. Roxas gazed dispassionately at the arena. Olette had rushed the ring and was jumping on Hayner in excitement. Roxas felt a small smile tug on his lips but he no longer felt like joining in his friend's victory. He stood and summoned a portal. Casting one last glance at the arena, Roxas disappeared. He would congratulate his friend some other time.

* * *

The Organization was thankfully empty when Roxas stepped into the hallway. The blond vaguely recalled a training exercise which had been scheduled for that day. Thankfully he and Axel had been excused from it, as had Zexion and Demyx. The whole point of the exercise had been to make the members more efficient in their fights and - Roxas shuddered at this thought - team building. Realization dawning - Axel would be hanging around somewhere - Roxas remembered Namine's advice and decided it would be better to just get the awkward conversation over with as soon as possible. With that thought in mind, he headed for the pyro's room.

"Have you _seen_ this?!" Axel demanded as soon as Roxas reached his door. Roxas leaned against the door jam.

"Your greetings are always so eloquent," he stated, crossing his arms. Axel didn't even glance up from his laptop screen.

"Shut up and come look at this." Roxas sighed and pushed himself off the door jam. He crossed the room, grabbing the desk chair and dragging it over to where Axel lounged on his bed.

"Alright, what am I looking at?" he asked, flopping gracelessly onto the chair. Axel wordlessly passed the laptop to him, an evil glint in his eye. Roxas eyed the red-head warily before turning his attention to the webpage. Axel watched as the younger boy read the story, his grin widening in direct proportion to the widening of Roxas' eyes. "What the hell, Axel?" he demanded, all but chucking the laptop at the laughing man. "The fuck is that?"

"That," Axel stated, trying to reign in his laughter, "is what I believe is termed 'fanfiction'."

"And people are writing about us?" Roxas demanded. Axel shrugged his response, still grinning.

"Apparently the dream incident planted ideas. This network," he gestured to the laptop, "popped up overnight on the Organization's inter-office system." Roxas rubbed his forehead, eyes closed and his expression pained. He suddenly froze, eyes popping open.

"How the hell did _you_ find out about it?"

"Zexion," Axel smirked. "He found Demyx reading a rough-draft." Roxas moaned low in his throat. "Apparently," Axel continued relentlessly, "Larxene has him editing her stories." Roxas felt his hands clench convulsively. He always knew that girl was satanic. "Zexion used some term for it, but I don't remember."

"I am working…with a bunch of perverts," Roxas sighed.

"You knew that before this happened." Axel pointed out, shifting to lean his back against the wall and crossing his long legs.

"Yes, but at least it was kept to random texts of, 'Roxas come quick! I broke my pelvis strip-dancing in the kitchen'." Roxas deadpanned, leaning his head on his fist, his elbow resting on his knee.

"Any reason you came to bother me? Other than bemoaning the fact that our co-workers think we're gay for each other?" Axel asked, peering over the screen of the laptop, which he had placed back in his lap. Roxas rolled his eyes.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did my arrival interrupt you in your reading of physically impossible porn?" he asked. Axel let out a startled laugh.

"Actually, I still haven't turned in the report from our last mission. I _was_ working on it when Zexion popped in, followed by you."

"That mission was a month ago," Roxas pointed out.

"Yes, it was." Axel agreed.

"You're such a slacker."

"And you're ignoring the question. What's on your mind, blondie?" Roxas paused, taking a good look at the pyromaniac. Axel was still sitting cross-legged in the middle of his bed, back leaning against the wall. He typed steadily on the keyboard, eyes trained on the screen while he waited for Roxas to answer him. Nothing. No sudden urge to pounce the red-head, no uncontrollable urge to kiss him. Axel paused in his typing, fixing his gaze on Roxas. "What?" he asked, before smirking. "I mean, I know I'm gorgeous, but what are you staring at? Something on my face?" It was too good an opportunity to pass up.

"Yeah, that huge thing you call a nose," Roxas responded, grabbing Axel's pillow and smacking him in the head. Normalcy restored.

* * *

Roxas let out an annoyed groan as a shrill beeping pierced the air. His pillow shifted beneath him and the alarm clock was silenced. Roxas sighed in contentment and shifted closer to his warm pillow (It was not _cuddling_ - because Roxas, as he would beat into you, does not cuddle. It was, however, pretty damn close). His pillow chuckled, and the blond reluctantly opened his eyes.

"You're not a morning person, are you?" Axel asked.

"Fuck you." Roxas muttered by way of a morning greeting.

"I believe it was the other way around last night." Axel stated, yelping when Roxas bit his side in retaliation. The red-head surged up, flipping to pin the shorter boy beneath him before -

Roxas jerked awake as his alarm clock blasted _There is a Light_ by The Smiths. _Take me out, indeed_...

~Review~


	3. Hazards of Alcohol & the Morning After

Despite the ever-growing popularity of the Axel/Roxas fan-site (and Roxas _really_, _really_ tried not to think about that) and Roxas' increasingly specific dreams, things continued on as normal between the blond and Axel. They would hang out, tease each other, argue, beat the shit out of each other and promptly start the cycle all over again.

They were in the middle of one of the teasing sessions when Roxas froze, his head tilting to the side. Axel stood with his hands on his hips, a filthy smile on his lips. The taller man was shaking his head at something Roxas had said and the blond watched the longer strands of Axel's hair slide over his shoulders.

"Honestly, Roxas, you're always in control of yourself. I bet if you get properly pissed, you'd be a little sexual deviant." Roxas forced his attention back to the man in front of him and responded by raising an eyebrow. Axel's responding grin could only be described as lecherous. He tossed an arm over Roxas' shoulders before pulling the shorter boy close and dragging him out the door. "Roxas," he asked sweetly. "When was the last time you were in a bar?"

Which was how the blond found himself hunkered down in a corner booth nursing a…whatever alcoholic beverage Axel had placed in front of him this time. He reached for it - still sober enough to know that he really shouldn't keep drinking, but too sloshed to care. As he raised the glass to his mouth he wrinkled his nose at the smell. It was a fruity taste and as he sipped the cloying liquid he could feel it stick in his throat. He slammed the glass back onto the table, pulling a face as some of the liquid spilled over the side of the glass and splashed onto his hand. He could feel his body sway slightly and he narrowed his eyes, trying to focus on the figure across from him. Axel watched with a bemused expression, taking a pull from his beer.

"How many drinks have I had?" Roxas slurred.

"That's your third," Axel answered, pointing to the mostly full glass on the table. "You're a fucking lightweight." Roxas scowled.

"'M not!" he argued. "I just haven't been drinking in a while," he explained, taking the time to enunciate each word carefully. "And I haven't gotten utterly _wasted_ in years."

"Mm, explains the stick up your ass."

"Leave my ass out of it." Roxas ordered, leaning across the table and snagging the beer out of Axel's hands. He took a pull, trying to get the sickly sweet taste out of his throat. Axel relinquished his beer without protest, signaling the server to bring two more. The blond sighed before slouching down in his seat and licking the remaining beer off his lips. Axel's eyes fixated on the movement before he looked away, clearing his throat. "This would be a tie-down night." Roxas stated - more to break the awkward silence than anything else. He winced when he realized what he had just said. Since when did his mouth speak without permission from his brain?

"Tie-down night?" Axel asked, eyebrow arching. Roxas sighed.

"It's what my college friends used to call it. It's when you get so wasted that you wake up the next morning tied to the bed and your clothes are missing." He explained. He was glad that the alcohol had caused his face to flush, otherwise the slow, lascivious grin spreading across the pyro's face would have had him beet red.

"Why Roxas, how very kinky of you. Have a lot of those, did you?" the red-head leered.

"Not me!" Roxas snapped, wishing he could disappear into the booth cushions. "But it happened often enough to my friends."

"Too bad," Axel sighed, tossing his head back as he took a swig of beer. Roxas stared at his neck, mentally reminding himself _not_ to crawl over the table and into his friend's lap. "I'm sure you would have been quite the experience." Axel mused. Roxas snorted, resting his head on the table.

"How do you know? For all you know, I could _still_ be quite the experience." Realizing what he just said, Roxas groaned before pushing himself back into a sitting position. Axel sat frozen, his beer caught halfway to his mouth. His eyes were fixed on the smaller boy, pupils blown wide and expression unreadable. Roxas' heart froze in his chest before beginning to beat double-time. "I think I've had enough to drink," he stated, digging for his wallet. "What do I owe you?" Axel shook his head while setting his drink down on the table and when he looked at Roxas again, his eyes were back to normal.

"I'll pay," he stated, disappearing from the booth. By the time he returned Roxas had managed to scoot his way to the end of the booth and was trying to convince his legs to support his weight. Axel hefted him out of his seat, wrapping an arm around his waist to help support him as they made their way to the door.

"I'm drunk," Roxas stated, stumbling against the taller boy. "I never get drunk."

"I believe I told you that that explained why you had a stick up your ass." Axel stated, stopping to re-adjust his grip on the blond's waist.

"And I believe I told you to leave my ass out of it," he responded, stumbling once more against the red-head as he tugged the blond along and _jesus_ had Axel's body always been this warm? Axel let out a long suffering sigh as Roxas tripped and sent both of them sprawling onto the pavement. They'd never get home at this rate. Standing and finally deciding _fuck it_, Axel summoned a portal. Lifting the shorter boy back onto his feet, he dragged him back to the Organization.

* * *

Roxas woke with a pounding headache and instantly resolved to kill his best friend. The only thing that brightened the day was the fact that he had been too drunk to dream the night before and a sticky note had been placed on his radio alarm clock declaring, in Axel's scrawl, that the blond had been given a sick day to recuperate from a twenty-four hour flu virus. Maybe he wouldn't kill the red-head...but he _would_ savagely beat him. Tomorrow. After the room quit listing about like a ship at sea. Roxas moaned and pulled the covers back over his head.

The next time he woke up it was to the near-silent noise of someone trying to pick his lock. He huffed in annoyance - knowing full well who that 'someone' was - before padding across the room and yanking the door open. He snickered as Axel flailed before regaining his balance.

"That'll teach you to try and break and enter." Axel shot a glare at him.

"See if I try to bring you food again," he stated, holding up a plastic bag with 'Way to the Dawn' printed on it. Roxas gave it a cursory glance, more focused on what was sitting innocuously on the floor.

"Is that coffee?" Roxas demanded. Axel smirked and the blond scowled at him. "Keep smiling, but there will come a day when coffee will no longer save you," he muttered darkly, grabbing the proffered cup. He turned back into his room, leaving Axel to scramble off the floor and deal with the food.

"Are you this pleasant to your other guests?" Axel asked, pulling two take-away boxes out of the bag. He popped one open and glanced inside before handing it to the blond. Roxas grabbed it from his spot on his bed, ignoring Axel as the red-head sprawled in his desk chair.

"Consider it payback for the hangover I have today, asshole." Roxas replied amicably. He tentatively took a bite of his scrambled eggs. Closing his eyes, he sighed in relief when he didn't have to run for the bathroom. When he re-opened them he found Axel looking at him - the unreadable expression from the bar on his face. "What?"

"Nothing," he stated, turning his attention back to his sandwich. Roxas' eyes narrowed.

"You're not pulling that shit. What?" Axel sat back in the desk chair with a sigh. His eyes skittered around the room before landing on the only photograph in it. It had been snapped at last year's Halloween party. He, Axel, Demyx, and Zexion had been sitting in a group on the fountain's edge in Hollow Bastion. Demyx had been grinning widely at the photographer, an arm tossed around Zexion, who looked less than impressed. But Axel's attention was focused solely on the small blond. Roxas couldn't remember what they had been talking about but he remembered that he and Axel had spent the majority of the party huddled together on the fountain wall, Roxas talking in low tones and Axel listening and watching him intently. A small smile creeped onto the pyro's face as he stared at the photograph.

Roxas glanced from Axel's face to the photograph. His eyes raked over the picture, taking in the details of the photograph. His attention was arrested at the emotions on Axel's face and Roxas wondered just how long the red-head had been looking at him like that. He swallowed at the realization - his mouth suddenly dry. "Did you know," Axel began, eyes not moving from the picture, "that you can make your dreams happen while you're stuck in the machine?" Roxas felt like he had been punched in the gut as the second realization hit him. "I didn't want to tell you because you were so annoyed by it," he explained softly, finally moving his gaze from the picture to Roxas. The blond's gaze stayed locked on Axel's eyes in the photograph, taking in how green they were behind his Zorro mask. "I knew you were straight, but I thought you knew..." The red-head crumpled his trash, shoving it into the plastic bag before moving to stand. Roxas moved faster.

"You're an idiot," he stated, pinning the taller man to the desk chair; his knees were on either side of Axel's hips, his hands clutching the collar of Axel's shirt. "You're a complete asshole and that Zorro dream was _positively horrible_, Axel." The red-head laughed in surprise, his hands moving to Roxas' waist to help steady the blond.

"What? You mean..." Axel trailed off, his eyes searching the blond's face. "But I thought...what changed your mind?" Roxas could feel the blush rising and he turned his face away. A slow grin made it's way onto Axel's face. "Why Roxas -"

"Shut up," Roxas interrupted. "Just...shut up." Axel kissed him in compliance.

~End~


End file.
